yourplayersaidwhat:

Disgruntled NPC: “I have a contract naming me the rightful owner of-“

Dragonborn Barbarian: “I eat the contract.”

Me, DM: “Fuckin’ WHAT?!?”

Barbarian later, out of character: “Look, all I know is that the contract was causing all this trouble. So I figure, if I EAT the contract, then the problem goes away!”