Month: August 2014

jackrahbit:

shadowcow:

rumze:

xairathan:

…

Oh Em Gee

I just want to point out one thing here: When was the last time the people contracted the cancer?  Ever?  Has it happened ever? I seriously think it might not have happened ever.

Having watched a lot of John Green’s videos and interviews, I’m going to have to say I’m 99.9% positive this is a joke anyways 😛 But you are right, I don’t think most media that even includes someone with cancer actually focuses on any sort of decline or aftermath, they just go “You have cancer” and shortly after “You’re fine/dead, sorry mate.”

It’s clickhole? Yeah, it’s fake.
Clickhole is a new site from the onion.

prokopetz:

This is the one time of year that I love wasps.

Not because the wasps themselves get any nicer. They’re horrid little creatures year round. No, it’s because I have a couple of big apple trees out back, and late August, early September is when the apples start ripening.

Now, if you don’t harvest your own fruit, there are two things you need to know about apples.

The first thing you need to know about apples is that, when apples get ripe, they tend to fall from the tree at the slightest breeze.

I often work late at the office; by the time I get home, there are piles of apples scattered everywhere – and sure enough, the wasps are out in force, gorging themselves on the fruit. When I go to clean up the windfallen apples, the wasps naturally do the “rawr, I’ma fuck you up!” routine for which wasps are known.

The second thing you need to know about apples is that they ferment very rapidly in the late August heat.

So: the wasps try to come at me, but they’re too drunk to fly. They get about an inch off the ground, then faceplant directly into the turf, flip over onto their backs, and lay there, legs twitching in the air as they try in vain to find something to sting.

Perhaps I’m a man of simple pleasures, but I bust up laughing every. single. time.

Fucking wasps.

outofworkderpy:

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