Author: Rei_zero

PLEASE JUST LET ME F*$@ A HORSE

yourplayersaidwhat:

Context which is sorely needed, our party consists of 2 Dwarves a fighter and a barbarian, A water Genasi bard/rouge and me an Aarakocra Paladin.

Myself and the dwarf didn’t want to retire for the night so we decided to hit the Red Light District.

Zoltan, the Dwarf bumped into a Centaur prostitute and tried to seduce her. Zoltan forgot however that he had no gold…

Zoltan: “I’ll tell you what I’m hear on behalf of Savaseous Earl (butchered an NPC’s name) come with me and he will cover for me.

Zoltan: (walks up to me) And this is Savaseous Earl, He will be paying.

Zoltan: Savaseous if you could pay the kind lady we will be on way to break in my new mount.”
(Players losing it right now)

Me: “Yeah, ain’t no way. I’m not paying for you..”

Zoltan: “Please!!!! Please just let me FUCK THE HORSE!!!”

At this point both in character and ooc I’ve fallen to the ground laughing as well as all the other players and the DM.