balfies:

an-xfile:

actuallybenwyatt:

I met a couple Australians this weekend and they introduced me to what is possibly the greatest phrase in the English language. Apparently, a common response to a wide variety of questions is “I’m not here to fuck spiders”. It means “I’m already doing that” or “Obviously, yeah”. So like, example usage:

At the bar with a friend.
Friend: do you want to get a beer?
Me: well, I’m not here to fuck spiders.

ive literally never heard someone say that what fuckin australians did you meet

mate those Australians introduced you to the grand Australian tradition of fucking with foreigners and making them believe anything about Australia

It’s true. We totally do it.